Hey Mr. Financial Planning Dude, how can you understand us folks who didn’t learn about money and it’s a painful subject? Let me tell you, mild mannered citizen, I’ve had my share of money regrets. In fact, I continue to have money regrets.
I think it’s really important to talk about past money regrets, learn from them, and realize that you’re not the only one and they’ll always happen. That way, when something does come up it won’t derail you. Some of these might not initially seem related to money but trust me, they are. Please accept this offering; an accounting of some of my biggest regrets.
Regret 1: WoW in College
Hoo boy, starting off strong. I played an excessive amount of WoW in college. I had a ton of fun doing it and made some great friends. In fact, I still kind of wish I could get that kind of unadulterated fun I got from raiding.
However, I missed a lot of things that I could have done in college if I hadn’t been quite so obsessed. I had some friends from my time there but I’m a really social guy; I missed out on a lot of opportunities to make some great friends. My health also slipped. I barely moved and I ate a ton at random hours. I didn’t sleep enough. Who knows what that fill cost me over the long run. Finally, I missed a lot of class and probably didn’t take some classes I would have if I were focused on school. I might have done more or learned more.
So why is this a money concern? Well, first it meant that I didn’t get internships which would lead to jobs. That meant finding work afterwards was a lot more difficult. Second, I know for sure I incurred some extra healthcare costs (and will over the long term) for letting my health slip. The biggest one though is the opportunity cost for what I could have done with the time to build professional skills and a network.
Regret 2: Not learning my financial basics
I don’t think I’ve been terrible with money for most of my adult life but there was still a ton of basics I didn’t know. My parents told me to save 10% of what I made into my 401(k), I never put money on a credit card that I couldn’t pay off at the end of the month, and I’ve always been a pretty reasonable spender. That’s one that the WoW habit helped with actually. It’s a big savings if your entertainment budget is mostly that $15/month.
However, I didn’t know about why it was a good idea to save into my 401(k). I didn’t know what options I should take advantage of at work through my employee benefits. I didn’t know what to do with some extra cash I had. Most certainly I didn’t know how to do long term planning. I had plenty of time to learn all of those things, or at least start the process, but it was never a priority.
I didn’t start off knowing even the most basic things. As a kid, I always wondered why my brother could afford to get the cool, extra Pokémon card packs. In retrospect the answer is obvious. He didn’t spend our small allowance on the random candy and such that I bought. He saved it for specific, high value, things. And yes they were high value, fight me.
I would bet you that this mistake has cost me tens of thousands of dollars over my working life. That’s a mix of savings, avoiding spending on stupid shit I don’t use, and growth from investments. Damn.
Regret 3: Not getting roommates after college
I had really, really crappy college roommates. I’m still friends with some of them but even the good ones came with awkward situations. I felt horribly burned by those experiences so when I moved from the SF Bay Area to Madison, Wisconsin I celebrated that I could afford a place on my own.
However, that was a big mistake. I spent way more than I needed to on rent and utilities and I was isolated. In addition, my job had me travelling constantly so I wasn’t even using the space! I could have easily saved over $6,000 annually for three years if I just took on a roommate. Imagine if I had saved even half of that. You’re talking about a lot more cash in the bank for someone who is only 28!
About the only good thing to come of it was I got my cat. I was really feeling that isolation and my travel schedule precluded getting a dog. Adopting Doof was, and is still, a phenomenal decision.
Regret 4: Not buying a home when I could
A first, important clarification: I regret not buying a home when I could afford one right after a major downturn in an area that I knew would grow.
I started working at Epic right as Americans were gaining some confidence that the end of the Great Recession was in sight. Homes were still dirt cheap. I could have purchased a fairly large home right across the street from Epic and been well within my means. I knew Epic was a growing tech company that brought in a lot of young outsiders who would need housing. Heck, I was one. I could have rented some rooms to roommates and built a lot of equity without a lot of my own dollars.
However, that kind of opportunity wasn’t even on my radar at that point. See not learning financial basics earlier. I’ve since learned that it’s really important to keep your eyes open constantly for interesting opportunities. You never know where they’ll come from.
So, is it always a regret to not buy a home? Nope. It can be a really, really dumb idea to buy a home if you don’t meet some of the rules of thumb for buying. However, that was a fairly unique opportunity and I was blind to it. I’m not planning on buying a home near where I am for a while and I think that’s a great decision.
Regret 5: Not taking care of myself
I alluded to this in the WoW one but it extends beyond that. For my first three years of my professional life I didn’t do a good job of mental or physical care. I worked at a company where I travelled all of the time, had an awesome subsidized cafeteria, ate on someone else’s dime on the road, and worked 60-80 hour weeks. Guess what I didn’t do! Eat well or exercise.
In high school I clocked in at about 190 and I’d say a decent chunk of that was muscle since I was playing sports. I was in good shape. Even at the end of my WoW days in college I was about 220. In my time at Epic I ballooned up to 250. That’s an increase of nearly a third of my high school weight. Part of that was because ice cream was an awesome coping mechanism for stress.
Similarly, I didn’t take great mental care of myself. I nailed myself to the wall for not being able to do my job in less than 60 hours a week and was constantly down on myself. I barely slept when I was on the road and I was often too tired to socialize outside of work. In fact, I got so depressed that I associated the fact that I was unhappy with life with being unhappy with my girlfriend, even though she was actually a beacon of light in my life at the time. We nearly broke up. Now we’re married and it’s the best decision I’ve made.
So how is this money related? First, I incurred more healthcare costs. I lost a ton of weight and with it some nagging medical issues. I also paid more for health insurance because guess what, I was obese. Insurers don’t like that. On the mental side, my horrible state had me leave a good paying job because I couldn’t cope with it. I then took 3 months off to recuperate, which was a lot of lost time. I also didn’t pursue any self-improvement during that time because I straight up didn’t have the bandwidth. That’s a lot of opportunity cost. Finally, I spent a lot more on things that made me briefly feel better since I needed the catharsis. That hit the wallet hard.
Conclusion
Everyone has money regrets and they come in different forms. Some are missed opportunities, some are bad decisions, some are increased costs, and some don’t even relate to money on the surface. Whether you realize it or not those past things still haunt you if you haven’t confronted them and figured them out.
We all act on money scripts that we’ve learned over time. Some of them are great (save 10% of what you make!) and some are horrible (buying things I don’t need makes me feel better) for building long term money you can rely on. You really, really should take some time to learn about yourself and to figure out how your past has given you strengths and weaknesses. I still reach for ice cream (hello Oreo coffee, my old friend) when I’m feeling down but I also keep an eye open for good investment opportunities. You’ll have your own that are unique to you.
You don’t have to figure this out alone. This is what we do- help streamers and consultants make great money decisions. If that’s something that sounds interesting to you reach out me or schedule some time for a free consult. You can check out what I do here.
